DREAM JOURNAL | Getting Shot

10:50 AM 0 Comments A+ a-

I didn't get a good sleep last night. I often experience that on Sundays when I'm usually parked on my bed all day doing nothing. Sometimes, I would get a 3-hour nap in the afternoon after sleeping in. I don't get tired. I'd be wide awake by my bedtime.

Normally, I would go to sleep no problem but last night, I had an earworm. Several, actually. I was watching clips of K-On!! Live Event ~Let's Go~ and as you know, the songs are extremely catchy. In my head, I was singing either Fude Pen ~Ballpen~ or Fuwa Fuwa Time. In years passed, I might be slightly embarrassed to be seen singing these kinds of songs but now... I'm actually thinking of mastering one of them for Anime Expo 2016 open mic. Truth.

And then, when I feel the arms of slumber finally enveloping me, I hear a loud snore. Okay, there goes my sleep again. When I do "sleep", it's so shallow that my brain is active. Brain keeps telling Body that, "You are sleeping. You do feel rested. But you're not really asleep because I'm wide awake." I didn't even dare to check the time when I snap awake. I'll just beat myself up.

But I did have a couple of minutes, hours when I was in deep sleep. I dreamed. And I actually remembered said dream. It's a fucking strange one. On par with my Nancy Drew and the Secret of Mirror Bay reenactment, my eavesdropping at the Rivendell scene in LOTR: FOTR right behind where Sam was hiding, and the ridiculous SCUBA class with one of the CSI:Miami character, Eric Delko. But this new one was a bit scary as well.

As you know, I walk home. Literally, from my workplace. It starts off as any walk home would until I reach one traffic light when I noticed two cars parked at the curb. I pass by both and I hear that a guy was verbally assaulting a woman. I ignore it, I had my earphones on. But one of the gang members stop me. Note that my head is telling me that I was dreaming and I felt no fear. The gang member asked for my phone which I refused and I clearly heard him say, "I'm not going to take it, I'm just going to clear something out." I don't know, maybe he thought I was recording the altercation. i don't remember exactly what happened after that.

Next thing I remember, I was at the living room of our house in Manila, Philippines. It was dark and there was the same gang member sitting across from me, by the door. I remember him saying to keep quiet because they were "doing some business outside". I assume it's drugs.

(No, our neighborhood in Manila is not a drug-infested dump.)

I don't know if I was talking in any way but I still felt no fear or pain. I actually kept saying to myself that it was a dream and I will wake up or fall into a deeper sleep soon. Next thing that happened was some people came and stopped outside the door and for some reason, I saw that they were Green Berets. The gang member across from me got spooked and fired a gun at my direction. I wasn't sure if I got hit or not; again, no pain, no fear.

And that was that. I think I slept a little bit more after that. Then I woke up fully about 30 minutes before my alarm. But I knew I was awake when my brother was getting ready for work.

So really, no sleep at all. Right now as I'm composing this to the tune of My Love is a Stapler in the background - seriously, don't judge by the title, it's an amazing song - I'm feeling a little sleepy, yawning here and there. It's going to be bad. I can't have too much coffee. I might have to eat through this.

I admit, I am a little bit alarmed at the nature of that dream. Why the drug bust? Why the gang? Why the raid? Why the gun? I looked up some stuff on dream reading. And no, I'm not going into dream journaling, mind you. Anyway, it's interesting and frighteningly accurate, the meaning of getting shot in a dream.

If the dream takes on an urban appeal with gang members or a type of gang mentality with assailants shooting to kill the dreamer, the tone of the dream comes across as the dreamer feeling overwhelmed by the majority and gives in to the imaginings of his or her biggest fears. The dreamer in life is being overwhelmed, overworked and feels weaker against the majority. Urban areas represent something manmade rather than natural so this can be more of a fight for survival of a financial status, social status or position of some kind that competes with the fellow man. -- Source.

Yep. Pretty much.

I don't know. I don't want to put much thought into it. But I can't help but think... is this what I have subconsciously? Should I get help? I've been doing great with destressing and what not but I think there's more to be said and done. I don't get lucid dreams or remember dreams that often so this alarms me a little bit.

That's that. I got that out of my system. If you've experienced similar situations, I would love to hear from you. If you have any advice for me, please, I'm open to anything.

(I know I still owe you guys the Anime Impulse recap. I'll do that after this one.)